Photo: Courtesy of O5
Northwestern students trying to make the most of their weekend before Thanksgiving were rewarded with ample weed and liquor. But, as evidenced by a party in a mysterious location, a cabbie insistent upon picking up Deuce riders at IHOP, and a corner of exiled stoners at an a capella party, this week’s party report is sketchier than playing beer pong with Jack Daniel’s. Oh, wait. We did that. Nice.
Thursday Night: A very fratty Thanksgiving
Home-cooked food, scantily clad girls and cheap beer—the perfect trifecta for impressing potential new fratstars. With rush quickly approaching, what better way to secure bids than to provide Thanksgiving dinner with some additional perks? The perfect combination of bro cigar time on the front steps and flirtatious conversations with hot girls (who had prepared for the event with each consuming her own bottle of Andre) is sure to secure a top-tier pledge class. With beer pong tables and 15 cases of Busch Light lining the hallways, you can guess the outcome. As the night progressed, the home-cooked meal was regurgitated into trash cans, toilets, and even back onto a plate — thanks to the quick thinking of an upperclassman. But could these roadblocks stop the young fratstars in training? Not at all. Immediately following the regurgitation of their Thanksgiving dinner, we hear a collective yell, “TO THE DEUCE!”
Thursday Night: The Deuce
Another week, another Deuce full of underclassmen. We try to make the best of our time at the famed Thursday night establishment by making a beeline for the bar. Even after a few drinks, we can’t drown out the terrible karaoke renditions of 90’s songs. Clearly, we’re not in the presence of any Bienen students. And when did the Deuce decide to make karaoke a regular Thursday night attraction? Things don’t get interesting until we head outside and try to pick up a cab on the street, only to have the cabbie tell us to meet him outside of IHOP a block down the road. Apparently, the visible police presence outside le Mark II is making these cab drivers nervous. And, obviously, our one block trek down Western Ave is a discreet way to avoid stares from the po-po.
Friday Night: Fucked up beer pong
Attendees arrive at an apartment decorated with dim Christmas lights and fancy wine glasses to celebrate one junior’s 21st birthday. Despite the party’s pseudo classy decor, general rules of conduct are rendered irrelevant. The hosts decide to start off the night with champagne pong. When the champagne runs dry, they move onto the Malibu. Then the Hpnotiq. Then the Black Label. Throughout the course of the party, the various pong players manage to consume the most expensive and/or strongest beverages on the liquor table. Still, we’re surprised when one girl starts to play Ketel One pong by the end of the night.
Friday Night: Party the Dark Knight away
A sorority formal dropped anchor at Hotel 71, home of Bruce Wayne’s penthouse. After passing a bottle of Svedka around the bus, well-dressed partygoers are treated to a fishy odor upon exiting the hotel’s elevators. Floor to ceiling windows overlooking the Chicago skyline set the scene. Couples bump and grind to a lengthy mix of throwbacks ranging from Bell Biv DeVoe to Sisqó. If you aren’t barfing in the bathroom upstairs, you are either binging on Parmesan fries or getting hair swished in your face by an aggressive dancer tearing up the floor. No longer capable of dropping it to the floor, everyone boards the buses with many promptly passing out in order to recharge for the parties back on campus.
Saturday Night: A mysterious black frat party
The slew of girls in skimpy outfits and their athlete beaus convene at the Century Theater. But they’re not at the cinema to see a late night showing of Twilight. The group makes its way to the Rhythm Room, a hidden spot inside the theater which looks out over the vacated Halloween store, to celebrate one black frats 100th anniversary. Despite the hefty entrance fee, a sizeable number of attendees still showed up. Maybe it’s because they were promised the most memorable night of the quarter, or they just wanted to celebrate the football victory with football players. Girls attend to freak dance, hunt for sorority formal dates, and to find out what the hell a party at the Rhythm Room would actually be like. Luckily, the venue isn’t as awkward as anticipated, and it includes what seems like the world’s longest bar. And best of all, the music serves as a welcomed diversion from the Top 40 we always hear at the Keg.
Saturday Night: Stoners and Jell-O shots
An after-show shindig starts just after midnight to celebrate on a cappella group’s set of fall shows. Shots (of the Jell-O and generic variety) get pulled out of the fridge and some casual Maroon 5 starts being pumped out from the speakers. A group of stoners, just evicted from a public parking garage, crash the party in an effort to find a place to smoke. Things get awkward as 20-plus a cappella singers burst in to a sing-a-long and the five stoners huddle in a corner. The night closes with a joint passed around and everyone simply passing out.
