In the Near Future, There Will be a Horror Movie About a Haunted Box of Porn
Ever had a nightmare of a box of porn coming to life? Yea. Apparently other people did too and they want to turn it into a movie.A Christian production company is currently working on “Harmless”, a Paranormal Activity-esque horror film. The plot: a father’s beloved box of porn unleashes a monster that looks like the girl from “The Ring” all grown up and about to get married. Designed as a “social commentary” on the evils of pornography, the film details how the Bad Hair Day Bride destroys the man’s family. Maybe their real problem is that they let their kid take a box of porn into the woods and stare at it. Considering how the filmmakers are actually serious about this project, it has potential for becoming a cult B-movie legend. Also there’s an ice castle or something. Follow the link for the trailer.
Half of all college students could be considered alcoholics
Good news from psychiatrists — you’ve got an even better chance of being an alcoholic. Not actually, but thanks to the new classifications of alcoholism and addiction problems, over 40-60% of college students could be considered alcoholics according to a recent study. The streamlining of all addiction diagnoses no longer distinguishes between substance abuse and substance dependence which previously separated heavy binge drinking from chronic addiction. Heartening news from doctors.
[TIME]
Freshman switches it up and gets frisky with a sailor
Female | Freshman | NMQ | Medill
As a freshman, I hadn’t heard any stories about out-of-town guys visiting Northwestern and figured they’d be fun. As a female, I figured any mildly attractive man in a uniform is worthy of my time and worthy of getting in my pants. It is these two unfortunate miscommunications that led to a fateful two weekends full of mental roller coasters… more 
“Smart Dillo” will help you have a safe Dillo Day
Debuting on Facebook on Wednesday, Norris marketing campaign introduced its latest campaign. All around campus armadillos are helping Northwestern students prepare for their namesake festivities. The “Smart Dillo” can be seen in a number of settings holding red solo cups (“Dillo day is a marathon not a sprint”), demonstrating consequences aka dressed up in police uniforms , and even sporting full graduation regalia (the ominous “Keep your future in mind.”). Smart Dillo offers students helpful reminders of what to do if a friend passes out (represented by an armadillo lying down with x’s on its eyes) and what to bring to stock up on the day. According to an insider on the photo shoot, the armadillos were sold as beer can holders on Amazon. Only at Northwestern would we find a way to utilize armadillo beer can holders for educational purposes. And only at Northwestern would it make so much sense.
[Facebook]
Storage Wars: Northwestern
The newly-colonized BoxCo. and the tried-and-true Campus Solutions seem to be facing off at the Arch today (and probably the foreseeable future) for your precious summer storage business. Who will you trust your mini-fridge and winter coats to?
World Wrestling Entertainment now a source of studying
Full Sail University, an entertainment trade school in Florida, has formed a partnership with World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) that allows the matches to be taped on campus and the students to work behind the scenes. WWE hopes that the college students who aren’t working will attend the events (because, really, who else would?) and the school is hoping that the hands-on work can really help the students develop their skills. So listen up
McCormick kids complaining about how they’re the only ones doing work, at least our RTVF kids aren’t studying pro-wrestling…
Intel’s extremely scientific guide to tanning
The sun is FINALLY out and you just can’t bear to do those last Gender Studies readings in the dark depths of core — plus, it’s getting too hot to wear leggings 24/7 and your legs are so pale they’re reflective. Solution: take a quick tanning break in between classes to catch up on reading, nap, and people watch. Why do anything inside anymore? more
Junior is a skilled crepe maker, wants a fresh-water squid for the lakefill
This Week’s Person You Ought To Know – A junior who hopes to one day open a gluten-free doughnut stand with his mom and dance the night away with Hillary Clinton. more
Starz TV series shoots in Evanston
If anybody watches “Boss” make sure to watch it being filmed right here in Evanston. Filming started Monday so head over to the Music Institute of Chicago at 1490 Chicago Ave. Maybe you can even catch a glimpse of Kelsey Grammar, who plays the fictional Chicago mayor in this Starz drama. Even though this isn’t as exciting as when “Transformers 3” was filmed in Chicago it’s still pretty cool watching all the expensive gadgets and A to B list celebrities.
Cookie Culture: Meet the students behind the Cookie Monster
It’s a Sunday night. You’re tired. You’re stressed out. You just got up to go back home after a frantic attempt to catch up on work in the library. The worst part is, you’re hungry. Of course you ate dinner… at six. A meal at Hinman can only keep you full for so long. As you step out of the library, you hear something. Like a light at the end of the tunnel, a break in the ongoing stress of your Sunday, a breath of fresh air. “May we interest you in some freshly baked cookies?” more
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