Iowa is the worst 9-0 team in college football history.
If you haven’t noticed, they barely beat Northern Iowa, a mighty FCS school. In fact, it took the Squawkeyes TWO blocked field goals to pull out the win.
“Oh, but that was just first game rustiness,” you might say.
Umm, how do you explain their narrow win over freaking Arkansas State?
Sure Iowa beat Penn State, but Iowa always beats Penn State so that doesn’t really mean much.
Their QB is CJ Bacher-esque…which means he has nearly as many interceptions as touchdowns this year. In fact he threw five, count ‘em, FIVE interceptions against the Indiana Hoosiers.
The Squawkeyes are down to about their 100th string running back, a true freshman named Brandon Wegher, which only shows they’ll go to ANY lengths to not start the God-awful Paki O’Meara.
Their receiving corps includes a dude named Marvin McNutt, who was a quarterback that was SO bad he couldn’t even beat out Ricky Stanzi for the starting job. He’s fast, but that’s about it.
Their defense is admittedly strong, but they’re banged up in the secondary, and they have no depth whatsoever. If you look at their season stats, hardly anyone beyond the starting 11 have ANY tackles. Eventually this is going to catch up with the Squawkeyes.
Iowa just appeared on the cover of Sports Illustrated, which of course means they’re going to lose the rest of their games. I’m actually going to burn that edition of the magazine after NU beats Iowa and post it online for all to see, so you can look forward to that.
Also, and this is a well-known fact, Iowa fans are incredibly annoying. They invade Stephen Woldenberg’s beloved wildcatreport.com, and just generally are a nuisance to civilized society. Iowa backed into their bowl game last year due to their rabid fan-base who have nothing better to do on New Years Day than go watch a meaningless game in freaking Tampa Bay.
Also, Iowa’s coach’s own son has been arrested, along with the vast majority of the team at one point or another.
All of these reasons will lead up to this…a win for Northwestern on Saturday.
Book it and laugh at all the pig farmers on your way back to Evanston after the traditional celebration of a NU victory at Kinnick wraps up following Saturday’s game.
